I was grappling with the question, “If I’m not living fully when I’m on the gerbil wheel, what am I?” What aspects of my personality, my history and my fears are driving me, limiting me and defining me – even (especially) when I’m not aware of what’s going on in me?
The answer appeared as an image – a kind of iguana-like character that reminded me of my son’s pet that used to launch onto my shoulder and hiss in my face. It was terrifying, and it was terrified. In a flash I could see, WHEN WE ARE SCARED, WE’RE SCARY! … And, we often can’t even see it!
Think mama bear protecting her cubs. Who of us can’t feel the rage of a parent whose child is threatened? Scared = Scary.
In a flash, scenes from my life appeared in rapid succession in my mind’s eye – I could see this Reptile – this scared one, acting scary – in my self, in my family, my friends and most especially, my co-workers. I can see, although I hate to admit it –mostly to myself, that my professional life is littered with marks left by my own Reptilian Responses and those of just about everyone I’ve encountered.
